adolescence's confusion??

There is something that I cannot deny it, I am really not a normal girl.
The confusion feeling rise up again, am I still an adolescence? Why I still have th sexual confusion in me??
Yesterday, I watched some LGBT confessions, anti LGBT confession and a video about tomboys. I have really strange feelings, when the lesbian ( the one with boy role ) talked about themselves, most of their traits fit me, EXCEPT FOR I DO NOT HAVE FEELINGS FOR GIRLS. I admit I sometimes do enjoy looking at tomboys picture (especially those which is really handsome, even more handsome than real boys) and sometimes wanted to become like that. I even dreamt of dressing up like a boy walk on the road and suddenly a girl came up and confess to me, well that is more like a prank, then I will say :"Hey! I'm a girl!! got'cha!! hahaha!" then run away lol. But I looked at hot boys/men picture and fangirled about them as well.

Maybe you will say that: "Hey! you have really sure that you don't have feeling for girls, then you must be straight! Why the worry?" The problem is...I think I don't have feeling for boys too, don't know is it real or it just I haven't met my true love that can touch my heart. But for the previous encounter with boys, I do enjoy their company, I like to hang out with them, I love to be by their side more than with girls, but when they confessed to me, this really strange rejection and denial feeling, not that I don't like them, but I really don't want to have anymore deeper relationship with them other than friend, when I imagine the scene of me kissing or doing other more closer things (like every other couple will do) with another guy or girl, this very disgusting and hatred feeling rise up. I've dated a guy before, but everything that we do, I reject them very much, then I thought I really don't suit to dating so I broke up with him.

I wanted to be more manly, I wanted to dress up like a boy, I wanted people to admire and adore me but I don't have romantic feeling for girls (or boys?). My family and friends would misunderstand if I really done that, is it impossible to become a straight tomboy?? My little brother even scolded me and give me the disgusted look whenever I borrow their clothes and cut my hair, my mom even asked me that am I like girls?

I do enjoy being a girl, I know who I am, but I hope I have the chance to become opposite sex of myself for only one day, that's why, I like cosplay as male character, I like Kagamine Len because he is the mirror image, opposite sex of Kagamine Rin.

I am really not normal.